I
miss
you!
Navigations above *points up*
I was born to tell you I love you...
I'm sorry I took so long...
for my baby;
Lady of perfection,
Do not be afraid.
You are not alone.
You have me to share your bed.
Lay the bed and set it up,
In crimson or in white.
Lay you down as so do I,
In brilliant blinding light.
If death comes for you.
Let it take me too.
Without you there is no life.
For I have life in you.
Hey its been a long day and a bit of a sucky weekend. Lets see, I went out on saturday but i had to go home like really really early so that really sucked. Then i went to boring cathecism class. sucky too. But then i went to AmCorp mall and met up with Ryan. That was nice la. So thats my saturday. Now today i went to SIC for mass. met up with Jade and then lepak'd at the bazaar. That was ok ler i guess. And she taught me her dance. Wow. Its really nice and i think its pretty hard. Whoa. Tara and another girl really did a good job in choreographing the dance.
AHHH!!!! The Exams are here... run...
I can't take it. Studying is such a bore!!! Wat am I gonna do? *sob sob* gonna fail wei... Thats not good. I mean I know I have to study but its just not happening. Can anyone giime some advice? I find myself dreaming abt wat I can do after my exams. Damnit.
Have any of you received that stupid e-mail or bulletin board post on friendster or hi5? Abt the love thing? You know the, "if you are thinking abt someone all the time, you are in love"?. That shit. Well it's kinda annoying when it kinda comes true but you don't really beleive it. Fuck.
Lets see... then we had an unexpected visit from Darren and Joseph. That was errrr... interesting? Wtv la. anyway went home and lepak's summore so its been a really slow day and not like to say very interesting so I'm sorry but this is a very boring post so you know. Haiz, i ciao first la. Byez..
Not only was it boring in skool but there was a debate topic my teacher chose to ask me to figure out. Great. So there were no friends in skool, everyone of them was out and I was stuck in skool with a debate to figure out. Great. Just great. So after failing to get anything out of me, my teacher calls Michelle and Kevan to come and discuss after break. So they came for wrong reasons so they agree to do it at like the 2nd or 3rd period so fine. I come up with an elaboration for the first point. He comes, and he points out a flaw i didn't see. well then my teacher managed to salvage one word from the whole thing. Fine. So i write another elaboration. and its shot down by Kevan yet again. Bla bla bla the idea is scrapped I have two failure's and Kevan is just remaining quiet. Wat the hell? I mean I really appreciate Kevan cos he helped ALOT but I mean come on la. He shot down two of my ideas which is ok but he himself didn't think of anything yet. Its good that he and Michelle really helped alot after that but after all the thinking and for some reason everything i thought of made sense when i said it till i put it down on paper. Damn. None of it made sense. Well i spent my lunch eating with practically "0" friends. Its like everyone decided to fuck up my day except for a few ppl la.
Well thats my day and now my computer doesn't have any sound. So no music = no entertainment. Gotta find something else to do now. Bye.
If you're reading this pls know that I really like you, and I'm so sorry I didn't tell you earlier.
My God... so mean man, the first thing anyone noticed abt me and Vivienne was that she was taller than ma =( damn bad man. Got 2 guys and a girl that actually took time to tell me personaly that she was taller. Namely, Charles, William and my mummy! (Seok Yee) Ok so the prom started late and it was ok. We got quite good food. It was ok la. Then everyone got photo crazy. everybody was taking pics so you can probaby expect lotsa pics la. Ok, so then the music started to play la. But ppl were either too shy to dance, busy eating, busy talking with their dates or worse not talkin to their dates.
Well then we have Kevan, Jolene, Toby and En She dance to floor filler cos well the only ppl that knew the dance were them la. They performed before you see. Come to think of it Michelle should know too... wonder why she didn't dance... oh well. Anyway, they danced and it was cool la. But nobody danced after that. I think that was followed by the crazy errrr.... guy dance with the loud counting? Can't remember which came first. Well those who went should know la. So then they hv these couple thingies and Kian Fai asked Ker Yii to be his gf... its Kian Fai la so I'm not very surprised. Oh yeah! Speaking of Kian Fai, he stood at the entrance to the Concorde really well dressed and stod there like a door man or something. All well and good when you see students coming but then there was this guy that was a guest at the hotel and though Kian Fai was working there, and he asked Kian Fai to help carry his bag. Hahaha. Stupid.
Oh well.... errr the rest of the night went in a very steady beat i guess. Ching Loong, me and William decided to have a little choreographed dance of our own but it didn't really turn out well but hey. At least i tried. I think out of everybody that learnt only the three of us could do it well. hahaha but thats ok. Then of course we had crazy dancing. Namely, Rave party, high on "E" and looking like we're stupid and drunk. Hahaha. It was really fun. Best dancer of the night.... MICHELLE! Whoa... she has some dance stamina or something. Everybody was fooling around but I mean even Michelle was but most of the time she was dancing "clubbing" style. Whoa... when I'm old enough must go clubbing with her. I'll pass out before her but its ok la. Hahaha. Hmmm then we have the crazy things boys do. Stage dives etc etc. Gang bang oso got. Hahaha. I kena. Forgot who else. Vooi Loon too i think. Oh yeah, Happy belated birthday Vooi Loon and errr... Happy Birthday to Jennifer!
Well basically the night was cool la. Abit noisy la so towards the end me and Vivienne went walking for some fresh air and silence. Well i guess thats it la. I'll pdate some other time. Bye bye. Ps I love the prom and hope got another one soon!!!
It was on last Saturday, I went out to MidValley and was supposed to go out with Jade and her friends, but her friends couldn't make it therefore she couldn't either =( Oh well. So I found some form 4 guys that were going to MidV and I met up with them. Hung out. Most of them watched a movie but I couldn't cos it started too late and I had to ciao at a certain time.
So the movie hadn't started yet so I went for lunch. Hmmm... Some rich ppl in form 4 which will remain unnamed *cough cough* *ke-van *cough* wen di *cough cough* went for Jap food, which would have been ok if I had brought enough money on that day. Awh well. So me Toby and Chingy went to eat at KFC. Big comparrison, Jap food >< KFC... So we all went there and we ate Cheesy Wedges!!! So nice and cheesy. But too much cheese. Too filling. And Toby being the fantastic genius that he is ordered more Wedges... filling. Then he "assumed" that I wanted cheese in my coselaw... -.-" How could I eat that now? So I stopped eating and looked at my cheesy coselaw. Wow. Greenish. Then he put even more cheese into my Mashed Potato then decided that it wasn't quite mashed enough. After throroughly mashing my already mashed and cheesy potato he then threw in the cheesy coselaw which resulted in a cheesy mashy potato-ish thing with vegetable bits popping out at regular intervals. Yum?
Well then we met up with the rest of the gang at Topshop. The guys were looking for clothes for the ever coming prom and the girls were well... just being girls and were trying out clothes for the hell of it. Hahaha. Hmmm then we went to Romp. That was nice... kinda. Well lets fastforward all this. Basically I went to the cyber cafe after that and when i was done I bought 3 tiger beers and a carton of shandy at Carrefour. Then while carrying all this along then called Pik San cos she was giving me a lift to the form 3 party only to discover that she had just ordered Pizza and I had to wait abt 1/2 an hour =( Well after a long time she finally arrives and Reugene is in the car an her cute little brother. Awh. So chubby and cute. He stole a Pizza. Hahaha.
Well then the rest of the journey includes getting lost a total of 3 times before getting it right and reaching the appartments where we were going to have the party. Well, then we moved everything down and oh yah! The "pool party" wasn't wat we were told it would be. Hahaha. The pool was empty cos it was being fixed or something. I was wondering if any genius would forget and try to push someone on. That would've been pretty interesting. But no. Well since there was no pool we had to improvise. There was the tap, empty bottles and balloons. Muahaha. Well I didn't really bring much clothes so I just stayed out la. Hmmm then as we were going upstairs cos well the party was basically over, I decided to burn the charcoal paper in hopes of cooking the chicken. Not a very good idea. It so happens that the flames aren't supposed to be 2 feet tall and green. Hmmm, I wonder why. So all the chicken was wasted but I got to prove to some ppl that a chicken wing, CAN fly. It just can't land. Hahaha.
Well so we were just talking and lepaking, playing and listening to music the rest of the night while ppl went back home. Abt 10 ppl in total stayed over and we all ended up sleeping in a single room. Well there seemed to be no space for me to sleep so me being the logical lazy person that I am decided to try and sleep sitting down instead of lying down. Then everyone else made noise and asked me to just squeeze in which i finally did. Then someone got hungry. So King Shun, Jolene, Wai Yang and Robyn went outside to cook or search for food. So the bed was empty save for Jacob. So I ended up sleeping on the bed and waking up at 5.50 the next morning. Then Pik San and Reugene woke up too. Then we realised that Jolene, King Shun and Wai Yang had gone out and were now trying to open the door. We waited for a few minutes... and they still couldn't open the door. So we decided to help the, being the good helpful ppl that we are. Hmmm... then I think we talk after that and then King Shun cooks some food and i ate then i went to disturb the rest of the sleeping ppl. I managed to get everyone up, then I myself went to sleep. Hahaha. I was awoken a few times and I remember vaguely Wai Yang screaming and Jacob trying to show me something.
Well I woke up at 11.30 and needless to say everyone went home except for me, Jolene, Reugene and obviously Robyn. Hahaha. I missed Mass. Oh well. Then we left quite late and went for lunch. Then I followed Jolene to MidValley where we walked around and stuff and eventually it came to a funny point where I agreed to buy really gay looking shirt next time while she would buy a very Ah Lien outfit. Just for the hell of it. I was supposed to go home but I was following Jolene's car to the LRT station. But since it was kinda late I decided that I should just go for my YKLS workshop straight away. The main idea was to get a cab from Bangsar LRT station. And I ended up following Jolene's parents to BSC. Then halfway they were not sure whether or not there was a taxi stand at BSC so they dropped me off in the middle of nowhere at a taxi stand. But i got a taxi anyway. Then I went to class and i managed to get a ride to the Eastin hotel where I was supposed to meet up with Jo and Fiona and Jo's friend Allynna, along with some other ppl. Hmmm I arrived in a singlet and a sleevless vest that was unzipped, so it might have made me a little weird in the Eastin, don't you think? So anywayz had dinner, finally met Ally. Hmmm... not wat I expected. Basically she's sneaky, weird, likes to stare at ppl that don't do wat she says and she's quite entertaining. Hmmmm, come to think abt it she IS quite pretty. Hmmm, then there was another girl there. Stephanie if I'm not mistaken. Tall.... Really really really tall. She was nice. Then there were these two other guys that I don't really remember they're names. Then another guy that came later. Rajiv i think. Then there was Tara. Now she sounded farmilliar. She came later and well everyone there was form 3.... or at least form 3 age, so I assumed that she was too. Then I realised where i remember her name from! She's one of Jade's friends. So I ask Ally if she's from form 2 then she says yes. Then Ally remembers that I know Jade so she tells Tara that I'm Jade's friend. Then Tara is like "Oh? Aaron?" And I am like 'Wat the hell???!!" Confusing. Well then I pass her the shirt thingy from topshop that I got for Jade cos I didn't get to see her so Tara could pass it to her for me. Well the rest of the night was pretty simple. Got a cab back to Plaza Damas so my dad could pick me up.
Ooh! There was YKLS practice last monday and it was ok ler. Well I'm sure I've already typed alot so I'll update my blog tomorrow la. In case I forget anything hehehe. Okie. Byez!
And knowing my luck tomorrows exams are going to be just as fucked up as my weekend. Fcuk man, everyone is studying or out having fun or to busy to even talk. Fuck it. Wat the hell man? Everyone in my form is busy studying for the fucking exams that last more than a week. Those who hv already finished their exams are out having fun and couldn't give a shit whether I'm bored or not.
You know wat? Fuck the world. Ryan you bitch, you were right. Why the hell has this weekend benn so boring? Seriously no mood man. The only thing to look forward to is the prom. Cos I'm not sure whether or not I can even go out this Saturday. This is so fucked up. Fuck my skool for having such long exams. Fuck this weekend which has been the most boring shit i hv ever experienced and fuck this life.
The Art exam was three hours long and I finished in a little more than an hour. That wouls be good if I could actually go out of class! I was stuck there for 2 hours. Damnit. But at least I got to lepak with John. That was fun and we were like fooling around and eating. My art looked ok. I started from the top down, so obviously it looks really sucky towards the bottom part cos well I get less enthusiastic abt doing a good job. So well there you have it.
Hmmm I'm having a good time thinking abt wat I'm gonna be doing at the prom. Foolin around, chattin, dancing... etc etc. I like the music nowadays. "American Idiot" is a really cool song. Ooh! I love "Flap your wings" by Nelly. Its soooo cool. I'm listening to one of his other songs rite now, "Iz U" really cool, really fast.
I like alot of songs actually... And I think I dun really hv anything to say so I shall just chat online now. Ciaoz.
"How was your exams today?"
"Ok la. Sejarah was ok but Maths was tough"
"Looks like ur singing days are over."
Wat the fuck man. Bloody bitch. Parents have this thing where if they're child fails they will always blame it on something else and take it away. Whether or not i had the YKLS to deal with, my results wouldn't get any better rite? Stupid idiots man. I hope if I ever have kids I never want to be such a bitch about things like my parents. Fuckers.
Lets see I stayed back for "extra class" today. Well thats just wat my mom thinks. I went to KLCC instead to acompany William to get his new sim card and so I could buy something. Hmmm, Jade, I hope you like it. I bought her something as promised but it wasn't the one she was talking abt. But that's lucky cos wat she was reffering to was RM159. Hahaha. Hope she likes it.
I also ate some food and I have to collect come cash from my mom then have to start saving a bit to pay Darren back. Ooh! The prom may be cancelled. That would suck but on the brightside (damn you Jade...hahaha) it would settle my money problem and I could go out a lot more but the problem is if my parents let me go out or not. I don't care if they're not happy with my results. I just don't give a fuck anymore la. I cared until my mom turned into a bitch so I'm gonna be a bitch to and annoy the fuck outta my parents. They deserve it. You know wat would be really good? If I got really good results and i shoved it into my parents faces. Then they would shut up. My dream... Anyway i gtg try and study so bye bye. Wish me luck!
Shit! Die man. I tot i sure gonna kena wan then he jus looked at me and asked me to study subjects, not language. Hahaha. Oops? Then he left a very confused Ryan and a freaked out Aaron in the class completely dumbfounded. Hahaha. That was good. Hmm... exams just went normally. Finish the paper as fast as possible, pray not to fail then fall asleep. That's actually quite a good plan.
Oooo I wanna go watch Dodgeball after the exams. But I'm not sure whether i can go out or not. I may not be able to go out and even if I was allowed I'm not sure of who to go with. Maybe I'll just stay home and save money. See first la my parents mood. Hmmm another question is how do i get my parents to allow me to go for the form 3 PMR party...?
Maybe I'll stick to the "But its after my exams!!!" story. I think its the best bet i have so far... not to mention abt the only thing I can think of. Ooh! Exorcist the Begining is coming out. I wonder if its 18. I hope not. I wanna watch in a cinema... not at home with a pirated DVD or even worse a pirated VCD. I think I'm doing pretty well in my exams so far but i have maths and sejarah tomorrow so I'm just going to cherish this feeling of confidence before i see the paper tomorrow. I'll probably just tembak the whole thing and fail with the rest of class la.
My my my... I've gotten through TWO WHOLE DAYS of exams but there are still 5 to come not to mention the Exam Weekend which will be killer to my nerves man. I'll just be really anxious to get it over with. I just got back from skool so I'm gonna go clean up now. I'll probably blog something else tonight cos I'll be on at maybe 8 or 9 or maybe even earlier. See la. Ok Ciaoz.
Remembering the past that hurt so bad,
I've loved you and I still do, you're the
One girl that made me see the maturity you've given me. However,
None of it was,
Appreciated
(BM Version) Hari Khiamat sudah datang... lari...
(Chinese Version) Fai tit ciao ahh!!!
(Jap Version) Ahhh!!!! Mi-ge-te! Tas-ke-te...
Hahaha. Ok Back to English. Hmm the karangan paper was actually easy compared to the crap I had to do for my other BM paper. I'm so screwed. Oh well. Hmmm lets see... after I finished my first BM paper (karangan) I still had lots of time to kill so I started writing song lyrics on my question paper in all directions. Then I decided to write that Love thing you know? Check out the last paragraph of one of my earlier blog entries "Love is more than a feeling... Its a fucking disease" I think its that one. Wtv la.
I ended up writing some pretty nice stuff I think. I hv 2 stanza's or paragraph or verse or wtv the hell you wanna call it that I particularly like. It's something like:
Loving is when I know I love her,
Even if she will never understand,
Even if it's one sided,
Even if she doesn't feel the same,
Even when I know she never will...
Loving is
Joking when in doubt,
Open when unsure,
Laughing when in pain,
Even when it hurts, even when
Nobody is looking,
Even when she doesn't know...
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Well Ryan read it and liked it so he asked me to do one for him but well I wasn't really in the mood so even though I did something for him it didn't turn out as nice as I thought it would. But thats ok cos he did one by himself and its not bad. He's gonna pass it to me to post it here.
Hmm... Nothing interesting has happened today. So until I think of something ti say I shall go for now.
There are sooooo many things I wanna do but I can only do it AFTER my exams and they don't seem very appealing at the current moment. I tried to study today and ended up taking a nap. Then I tried studying once I got up and ended up calling ppl. And well now I'm online and writing this so I think you can guess that this studying plan is not going as well as I expected.
Can anyone gimme soeme advice? Pls? *sigh* I can't wait till my exams are over man. Till then I'm stuck trying to study and I'm sure I'm going to end up doing something else or maybe even daydreaming. Whoa, my brother came back home after mass today. My niece is soooooo cute. She's like this blur and sometimes smiling chinese little ball of fat. She's so chubby. So nice to pinch her cheeks. Then when she sleeps she doesn't close her mouth. Hahaha. I actually tried closing her mouth today when she fell asleep in church and I just managed to get it more open. Hahaha. So cute!
Hmmm... Lets see. Wat else did I do today? Urmmm... Nothing much la. I read a book, listened to music and I've decided officially that Ryan Cabrera's "On The Way Down" will now be my favourite song. It's such a nice song and I think that the main reason I like it is because other songs are either too low or too high but this song is just right for my range and pitch. So cool and easy to sing! Its too bad I can't play the guitar otherwise I'd be performing it just abt anywhere to impress girls. Hahahaha! No la. I'm not so desperate. Hard to believe but true.
Hmmm I actualy have nothing else to say cos well not much happened today so I will go first la. Ciaoz.
This is bad. I expected to see like a hundred over ppl at the prom but that's highly unlikely right now. Damnit man. I think there's been a bad response and ppl can't or don't want to come so the prom may actually be cancelled. Thats sad. Errr... and i think a few friends that were planning to go may not be able to go after all. That's crappy. Wa liao... that means damn friggin lotta ppl aren't coming and there are already so few. We are so screwed. But thx to Jade I have to be positive and optimistic and look on the brightside of things. Damn.
Lets see the brightside of the prom going as planned is obvious so I won't even bother typing it. Urmm but if the prom is cancelled... awh man. Wats the brightside to that...? Hmmm... I think if the prom really is cancelld... errrr.... Ooh! I get to save like RM220. Cool. That would settle my money promblem. But I want to go to the prom la...
Wow and Gary is asking like everyone to be his date. No luck so far though so chances are you'll see Gary running abt in his weird semi-retarted way from table to table for no apparent reason. That sounds funny but I think I would just scream at him, stand up and slap him. Hahaha. That would be fun. Awh man, my sheep isn't coming and Ryan doesn't wanna come eiter. This is getting so crappy. AHHH!!!!!!!
I just remembered that I don't really know how to slow dance. Hehehe. Well at least I have Kevan to teach me after the exams if in fact the prom actually goes as planned. Hmmm... Slow dancing. Thats gonna prove a problem. =( You see Vivienne is already taller than me but I'm pretty sure she'll be wearing high heels so basically I'm gonna look really really stupid and out of place. *Sob Sob* Hmmm maybe I should take platform shoes into account... That might work Whaddya think? Yes? No? Hmm... need more thinking but first I need to pass my exams so i ciao first la. Bye bye!
Life's been sucky and a little depressing lately. Kinda fucked up really. If you know me then you should know that I only curse regularly when I'm talking, not writing a blog or chatting online or anything that involves writing. So you should have guessed that I'm either angry, depressed, sad, or all of the above.
I think that its alot better to be a good friend than a boyfriend. Its kinda sad to stay as a good friend for the rest of you life though. Oh and I've made a resolution to either stick to one girl or none so ya'll have to make sure i stick to that! I'm trying to prove to a certain group of girls that a boy can stick to one "road" at one appointed time. It's going to be hard =( But thats ok la. Being in love is too painful anyway.
Someone help me... Or I'm going back to dark music, depressing poetry and trying to bleed myelf as much as humanly possible without causing serious injury. Well maybe not. That was a very depressing stage of my life and I don't want to go through it again.
There's adifference between liking and loving. A very thin difference but a difference none the less. To love is like watching from a distance when you know you'd rather be right next to her. Love is when you know you should keep away but you can't help it. Love is when you're not comfartable with hanging out anymore, not like when you used to. Love is when you love that person whether or not she loves you the same way. Love is when you know you're happy for her even when she's with someone she likes, but you don't. Love is when you look at hope its that special someone every time you receive an sms or a call. Love is when the first thing you look for in a picture is that loved one. Love is when you know you're hurt by her and make a big deal abt something so small. Love is when you're seeing someone else but care for special someone more than whoever you're seeing. Love is when I know I love her, win or lose.
Hey, I warned you on my first post. I swear and curse, so fuck you too. Hahahaha. No la no la. But hope u dun mind la... if you do, then its not my problem and you can just fuck off. hahahaha. I'm being mean, hahaha. I like it.
Well skool is just the same. Boring and the teachers have lost all hope. Hahahaha. Too bad for them then. I wonder how we're ever gonna pass our subjects. It'll be a friggin miracle if we managed to pass all our subjects man. Wow... But I'm just gonna try la. Hopefully I won't screw up too bad. Studying sux you know? Have you ever heard yourslef say something like "I'm going to really study man. I'm not gonna go online or sms or chat on the phone. No way man ." Then the next thing you know, I'm on the phone, sms'in a friend and writing this bloody blog. Crap. This is bad. But on the good side i can enjoy abt two weeks after my exams cos thats how long i think i can keep lying to m parents that the results haven't come out yet. This is gonna be tough.
Well at least I have something to look forward to after the exams. Going out, party and prom (GOPP). Hope it goes well. Oh yeah and the other day I passed up my art homework that has been overdue for the past two months and it was really good and you know wat my teacher said when she first saw it? "Who did it?" !!! Heheheh.. actually my mom helped me. Hahahaha. But it WAS good.
Hmmm I just had spagetti. Yum. Did I spell it correctly? Spagetti? Ah who gives a fuck. It was good and thats the bottom line. I think I've been sms'in too much lately. So low on credit now. Awh man. Haiz, just reload again later la. But waste money la. Oh yeah, the YKLS performance is coming in december so yay! I'm looking forward to it. I think it sounds ok currently. Maybe can be better. Anywayz, you better come!!! I think I have a small band of supporters from my skool coming. Hahahaha. Well looking forward to all my plans AFTER my exams. *sigh* Anywyaz, I gtg now so ciaoz.